Day 4. Saint-Gervais-les-Bains: Driving Chaos & Alpine Views

Saint-Gervais-les-Bains Pronounced "Sah-Jeravay-lay-ba" is a charming, traditional French spa and market town in the Alps, known for its stunning Mont Blanc views, year-round activities like skiing, hiking, and its famous thermal spa.

Before leaving Annecy, we started off the morning with a coffee and some French toast at a small café just down the road from us called "Slake". Finally, decent coffee, and the French toast was just amazing, covered with apricots, almond flakes, cinnamon, and lightly whipped cream with a rosemary filling.

Saint-Gervais-les-Bains: Hire Car Stress and 70s Fondue Fails

Picking up the hire car wasn’t too bad; it was just near the station, except once the paperwork was complete, they then advised me that I had to fill the car up as it was empty. They assured me that I needed to drop it off empty and would not be charged (hmmm).

As I walked around taking photos of any dents and scratches, an old French guy asked how long I was going to be. I said about five minutes, but he was impatient and stood there glaring at me. Feeling the pressure, I thought we’d better get going; however, I haven’t driven a left-hand vehicle since Canada, which was nine years ago, let alone driven a Citroën. Anyway, the pressure mounted, and the old fellow was in his car reversing up to me before I had even worked out how to start this beast.

Driving on Empty: The Hunt for Fuel in France

Once I had it started, the fuel light was flashing and constantly beeping at me, and I couldn’t turn it off. The fuel gauge was also showing “zero”. The stupid idiots didn’t leave one drop of fuel in the car, and I will name and shame them: “Enterprise Car Rentals Annecy”. Steer clear!

Finally, we got the car moving, and the first thing we needed was a service station, and as we have found out, they’re as scarce as hen’s teeth. Driving down the road, I couldn’t believe how narrow they were, and to make matters worse, I had asked for a small car, but in their stupid, brainless wisdom they upgraded me to a large SUV. Looking around the interior, it was absolutely filthy, with paper on the floor AND a melted box of chocolates in the glove compartment, along with the outside looking as though it’s never been washed.

With the GPS on leading us to a station 5 km away, the constant beeping was driving me mad and it was hard to concentrate, and I was waiting to run out of fuel at any moment. I said to Leanne, “Can you tell me when I need to turn, as I can’t look at the GPS and drive this thing.”

Still, the GPS was telling me one thing, and Leanne was reading out the French names of the streets I should turn into. “Reading the names in French isn’t going to help me — just ‘left’ or ‘right’, or how many metres.”

As I said earlier, service stations aren’t the easiest things to find, and when you do, most are fully automated, with no service attendant. You have to put your card in first, then fill up. We found one, and I pulled in and tried to read the faded French instructions on the pump, but to no avail. I fumbled my way through it and the first card was declined, the second card was declined, and the third. By then I had cracked it, and off we went to find another one.

Leanne was continually trying to read the street names in French, and after fifteen minutes of driving around in circles, backtracking along roads we’d been on, I finally found another service station. In we went. First card: wrong PIN. Second and third attempts: card locked. “Shit!” “Leanne, your card please?” Finally, progress! I was pumping fuel, and I was as excited as a child in a candy shop! Those bastards at Enterprise are going to get it back empty, all right… even if I have to drive around their car park all night.

A Scenic Escape: Menthon-Saint-Bernard

Stress levels were on the decline as we left the city and entered the countryside, with our first short stop being “Menthon-Saint-Bernard”, still on Lake Annecy but further south on the opposite side of the lake.

Cyclists and I don’t get along, not even back in Australia. Here, I have never seen so many on these narrow, winding roads — rude and sometimes just brainless twits with no sense of road rules, or they’re just arrogant. They won’t move over even though there is enough room, and you’re right up their clacker. They still ride three or four abreast on these narrow roads and give you foul looks when you finally pass them. What’s their problem? Do they all have the same parents?

We finally arrived in Menthon-Saint-Bernard, and what a beautiful lakeside town. This would be a definite spot for swimming, rather than Annecy, as it’s much deeper and easier to get into the water, and I could even see sand. We only ducked in for a toilet break, a drink, and a few photos, and I’m so glad we did. We didn’t get much time to explore, as we wasted a lot of time earlier with the fuel episode, along with the cyclists. But we saw what we could, and the esplanade is a very picturesque spot.

The drive to “Saint-Gervais-les-Bains” was stunning, with drives up through valleys and soaring Alps in front and on each side of you, green hills for miles, and passing through small villages. It’s definitely worth getting a car for this part of the trip, as most of this couldn’t be seen by train. My brain had finally kicked over to left-hand drive, so it was getting easier.

Our apartment view from the balcony St. Gervais-le-Bain

Arriving in Saint-Gervais-les-Bains: Balcony Views and Mountain Storms

We finally arrived at our accommodation and were greeted by our host, who spoke minimal English, so phone and Google Translate were our friends once again. Yes, it’s on the third floor and once again no lifts. I am yet to count the steps, but there aren’t as many as the last place. But the views from our balcony are amazing and this makes up for the stairs, you couldn’t get any better this.

We needed a drink, so we walked down into the village on the hunt for a bar and some dinner for tonight. The walk is only short, and the village is much prettier than we imagined and would be spectacular in the winter months. However, there was a storm brewing in the mountains just behind us. The thunder rumbling through the Alps was gut wrenchingly deep as it echoed throughout the whole valley. As we settled in for a couple of drinks, the wind started to pick up, so we headed inside the bar and perched ourselves close to the window to watch the approaching thunder storm. Rain came briefly with gusts of wind, and then stopped, that was it, the clouds cleared and turned into a starry evening.

The Fondue Mistake: Why I Think the 70s Fad Should Stay Back in Time

There was an Italian restaurant across the road called “Le Pur Bar & Food”, so we ducked in there and grabbed a table for tonight. It wasn’t only Italian, but also served German and Swiss dishes as well. The place itself has a nice, casual atmosphere, with outside seating too. Leanne settled on a pizza, and I tried their take on “fondue”, something I hadn’t eaten since the seventies when I was a child with my parents. I’d read up on this before coming over and was busting to try one in Switzerland, but this seemed close enough to the border — an Italian restaurant in France serving Swiss food… what could go wrong?

Leanne’s pizza came out and looked great, then their version of the fondue came out and was delivered with a smile. As it was placed in front of me, I looked up and we locked eyes. I looked back down, and then he was gone.

It was not what I imagined. Where were the rest of the dipping vegetables? All I saw were small pieces of bread and some cut-up roast potato, with a steaming bowl of melted Gruyère or Munster cheese in front of me, it looked like a bowl of uninviting blob of goo; however, I speared a small cube of bread along with a wedge of potato, submerged it into the goo, and gave it a taste. Not to my liking I’m afraid as the cheese had a funny aftertaste, I thought I'd get used to it so I tried it again all the while thinking how many carbohydrates would be in this dish? A few more dips later, I couldn’t do it anymore and realised that the huge dining trend of the 70’s was just a fad and should stay that way.

Sorry Switzerland, this probably wasn't a dish made to your recipe, but there's not going to be a second chance.

After another drink, we called it a night and made the uphill trek back to the lodge for some well-deserved sleep. Tomorrow we’ll head to Mont Blanc as the weather should be perfect.

Beer time time in a small café at Saint-Gervais-les-Bains